I noticed how I was ‘learning’ about others through the ‘bad’ traits I see in them that I do not want in myself. While I was judging their actions (not person), I am guilty of all those thoughts in my head:
“Oh gosh he’s such a terrible leader. That’s not me, right?”
“That’s so politically correct. I need to voice out my true opinions”
“Wah she’s bragging about her achievements. Is she trying to make others feel bad? I must not do that.”
“Going on and on about himself again. Uh. OK. I need to ask other people questions and not put the limelight over my own head like this..”
While these observations made me aware of what I did not want to be, it made me guilty that I was somehow being a bxtch to even think this way. By being conscious of how I should not act in a certain way, It has made me want to become a better person. My problem is that it stems from seeing others’ imperfections. And maybe other people are also thinking “gosh this girl is so direct with her words. i need to stay away” – and I wouldn’t even know what exactly I need to improve on.
Today I learn to see the person’s positive traits that I want to learn from, instead of the bad ones.
“She’s bragging? Oh, the way she speaks and the words she picks to describe her story. It’s actually pretty convincing.”